Sunday, June 23, 2002

Swimming Day

It was our second swimming day. Nikki has just finished school year and showed us last week her secret place. A place in the wood, a small but clear see, with a small meadow before and just a small trail and a small creek to it. Just a few village boys and Nikki knows about this place. She told us, that this is her virginity place because this is place where she has never fucked. The local boys and one of their girls she fucked out of the wood or in their cars but never in the near of the sea. She was naked in the moment we enter the clearance.
Now I understand why she is so balanced even with her history. This place is her soul, her light, her reason to live. At this place she is kid, not a young promescuitive lady. Today I had seen her with one of the boys from the other shore and his girlfriend and later I asked her direct for her first love and voila: This place was the place of her and the boy over there. Here was her first romantic kiss. The kiss of a fifteen year old semi-prostitute and a sixteen year old from a small village, but it was her first real romance. But the other girl was faster than she was. Bad luck, she told me.
Today she invited Jessica, Aron, Cerapho and myself to her secret place and at least for me and Cerapho it is the greatest possible honour she can give to us. And we have to promise her something: Not to tell anyone about the location of her place.

bye

Monday, June 10, 2002

White day

Till this morning I was a bit in worry about the story with Cerapho last week. He currenty loves a nice girl which would do anything for him - if he asks her for a rendevouz. He is in one hand so shy and do nothing without the explicit permission of a girl on the other hand, if you invite him like I do last week, he is under control like a machine.
Earlier Cerapho was visiting me. And he was not angry for me. He sat down on my bed and pull me down on his lap. His hands rests on my right naked leg. My pussy heated up and was wetting my panties. Cerapho told me to strip my other garment the top and I did it without asking why. He fondled my breasts, twirled my small nipples and than he told me, that he had thought the whole last week about my body (not that I have done anything else) and that he cannot stay it any longer. I offered him my body, pressed myself against him but he denied once again sex with me.
I asked him why and I was hitted by a sentence I told a lot of boys in my life before: He want to stay my friend but not my affair. I got angry but he peace me down with a nice finger fuck. I asked what the deal is and here it is (after a bit of debate): No fucking, just sucking. You ask: "This is not a good deal" I know, for a man the difference between oral and normal sex is not very great but it is a good deal. Currently I would give him head even if I am married. And I know something you do not know: A girlfriend of mine, a with a huge usage of boys and men in the past had given him a blowjob on a toilet a year ago. But instead of fucking her he licked the girl out till she ejaculates and further more till she came a second time. I do not believe this story till he finger fucked me a week ago. He is more than nifty he is gifted. And now, a few hours later I can really approve this. Frank eat me a lot of times but he never reached the niveau of Cerapho.

I am so excited about the next few days. Sure I have to give some head.

bye

Tuesday, June 04, 2002

Black day

Yesterday was a black day. A very deep black day. And I made some mistakes again. Yesterday was Juni, 3. A year ago, Frank left me. I had cried all the morning till Cerapho showed up and made dinner for us. He did not mention it, but he knew the date pretty well. He was just there and made my day a bit better. We did a walk through the English Garden, drank a coffee in a cafe and search a dvd for the evening. He even allowed me to select a romance despite he is not a big fan of this genre. As so often we were alone this night in the flat and so we opened a bottle of red whine and start to watch the dvd. I laid on him, his hand curled my hair slightly and everything was sweet as hell. And in this sweetness a very bad thought came up into my brain. To have sex with him. At least oral sex, because yesterday and today I am in my cycle. After the film I said to him to wait in my room during my shower. I showered, dried my body, removed the tampon and walked into my room in my full naked glory. I jumped him and start to kiss him. I start to open his trousers and even could feel his tool, when he pushed me down to the bed.
"Stop that", he told a girl with widely opened legs, a fresh shaved pussy and a strong will to fuck him. And now, my brain finally stop thinking: "Just a short fuck. Come on, my last fuck is year in past." "No" "Just a blowjob" "No" "Please Cerapho. Please." I begged him a few minutes till he striped down to his boxers and went into the bed. I was so excited. But he told me to turn around so he could lay behind me. I felt his hard tool when he whispers in my ears: "I stay here tonight, no sucking, no fucking. Do you understand?" "Yes" I answered.

The next morning (this morning) I gave him an handjob. No fucking. No sucking. He did not fobide me to touch him. He woke up with a smile I will never forget. He blew his load against my belly and he kissed me slightly. After my good morning shower he fetched me, threw me onto the bed and returns the favour and start to fingerfuck me. He is very good.

At the dinner he told me, that he do not like to fuck, just of my lost a year ago.

Now two hours later I am a bit confused. I nearly fucked my best male friend. I definitaly have a problem with my libido.